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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

My Wedding Soundtrack

Breaking news. I have my entire wedding soundtrack picked out. Just thought you should know. It's very exciting. I've been making a mental list of songs for years and years and the other day I stumbled upon the final song that fills in the only piece I was missing. The soundtrack is now complete and perfect and dynamic and I'm pretty confident that it will give you chills. Actually I know it will give you chills. The you'll-need-to-wrap-up-in-a-blanket kind of chills.

Well, looks like you'll have to wait until my wedding to hear the amazing song selections, that is, if you're invited to my wedding. To find out the answer to this, please respond "Yes" or "No" aloud to the following questions.

1. Do I know you?
2. Do I like you?
3. Do I want you at my wedding?
4. Am I having a big wedding?
5. If it's a small wedding, will you make the cut?
6. If you indeed make the cut, will you promise to give me something more thoughtful than a blender for a wedding gift?

(If you've answered "Yes" thus far, this final question will determine if you will officially make the wedding list.)

6. Will you have a nervous breakdown and cause a scene when The Chicken Dance, The Macarena, or any other lame kind of song causing a Conga Line to form is not played at my wedding?

Well, I guess the next step is finding the one and getting this show on the road. If you have passed my wedding invite test, please send your answers to me and I'll get those graded and processed right away. And don't check your mailbox for an invitation just yet, but when the time comes, an amazing soundtrack (that my future husband will have absolutely no say in) is waiting.